Mix Goodies

Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's mini van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.

'I realise it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed,' she explained. 'I'm afraid the neighbours will talk if I let you stay in my house.'



'Don't worry ,' Jack said. 'We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light.' The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.

About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend.

He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, 'Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?'

'Yes, I do 'said Bob'.

'Did you, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?'

'Well, um, yes,' Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, 'I have to admit that I did.'

'And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?'

Bob's face turned beet red and he said, 'Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did.' 'Why do you ask?'




'She just died and left me everything.'

(And you thought the ending would be different, didn't you?... You know you smiled...now keep that smile for the rest of the day!) Kekekeke!!!

Dear Penis...I dont think I like you anymore,
You used to watch me shave,
Now all you do is stare at the floor!

Oh dear penis...
I don't like you anymore,
It used to be you and me, a paper towel and a dirty magazine,
That's all we needed to get by...

Now it seems thing have changed,
And I think that you're the one to blame.
Dear Penis, I don't like you anymore,

He says...Dear Rodney,
I don't think I like you anymore,
cuz..when you get to drinking,
You put me places I've never been before,

Dear Rodney, I don't like you anymore,
Why can't we just get a grip on our man-to-hand relationship?
And come to term with truly how we feel,

If we put our heads together,
We'd just stay home forever,
Dear Penis
I think I like you after all,
Oh and Rodney...while you shavin....shave my balls!!!!




Song sang by RodneyCarrington.com.

1) Condom says to Kotex, 'When you work, I lose seven days of business.'
Kotex replies, 'If you fail to work once, my business stops for nine
months

2) A black guy and a white girl met at a nite club. She took him to her
apartment and said: 'tie me to the bed and do what black men do best!' so
he ran off with the TV and VCD...

3)Wife: 'I wish I were a newspaper, so you can hold me every morning!'
Husband: 'I wish you're a newspaper TOO, my dear so I can have a NEW ONE
every morning!

4) A Chinese couple got married. When baby was born, her eyes were big and
blue, hair was curly and blonde, skin was brown. Finally, name of the baby
was SAM TING LONG ('some thing wrong')

5) A lady visited her doctor one morning.
Doc said: 'You look so weak and exhausted! Are you eating your meals 3
times a day as I advised?
Lady : 'Doc, I thought you said 3 males a day!'

6) Phone rings and maid picks up the phone as her master is bathing.....
When the caller asked what he is doing, the maid replied:
'MASTURBATING.'(master bathing)